Self-Awareness of Automatic Negative Thoughts and Beliefs About Self in Motherhood
As a mother, developing self-awareness of Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) and Automatic Negative Beliefs (ANBs) about motherhood is vital to emotional well-being. We can cultivate healthier mental and emotional well-being by recognising and challenging these ANTs and ANBs about ourselves and our abilities as mothers. We must improve our self-esteem as a person and a mother to navigate motherhood's beautiful yet complex journey with greater resilience.
What are Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs)?
ANTs are spontaneous and often subconscious "negative" thoughts that arise in response to specific situations or feelings. As mothers, we have ANTs far too usually, especially in the early days of motherhood; typical examples include:
"I'm not doing enough for my child."
Because of my working hours, I am not as present a mom as I wanted to be.
"I feel overwhelmed as a mother; I must be a bad mother."
"My child's challenges are a reflection of my failures."
"my friend, handly motherhood is better and joyful, but I don't."
Recognising these thoughts as ANTs is the first step toward change. Remember, while these thoughts may feel real, they do not define your worth or abilities as a mother; however, if you don't become aware of those thoughts, you begin to believe those ANTs, and they become Automatic Negative Beliefs ANBs.
The Role of Beliefs in Motherhood Be aware of Automatic Negative Beliefs (ANBs)
Positive or negative beliefs about ourselves, our capabilities as mothers, and our perceived roles in our children's lives are often shaped by our own experiences, societal expectations, and cultural narratives. Many mothers usually grapple with beliefs such as:
" Instagram X reality, I should always have everything under control, desire the Instagram lifestyle."
"Being a good mother means sacrificing my own needs, putting my child always first."
"If my child struggles, is I not a good mother, or does it reflect poorly on me."
These Automatic Negative Beliefs (ANBs) can lead to a higher level of anxiety and create pressure about self, tension, and fear, which could lead to burnout or a sense of inadequacy. Motherhood is only one aspect of our life; we are still being a daughter, wife, sister, professional, etc., and the ANTs and ANBs also influence other aspects of your livelihood, not only motherhood.
If we don't develop emotional self-awareness in our long life journey, we begin to believe those ANTs, and they become Automatic Negative Beliefs (ANBs). Sooner or later, our ANTs and ANBs become our Automatic Negative Memories (ANMs) and, eventually, our new state of being, which is our new reality in our personal and motherhood journey.
Acknowledging our positive or negative thoughts and feelings creates an inner environment that fosters personal growth and a better understanding of ourselves and our children. The long personal journey of emotional self-awareness, self-love, self-compassion, and self-acceptance could be the key to better self-management and developing a more positive outlook for both struggle and joy in our motherhood journey.
Dear mum, always remember that prioritising your mental and emotional well-being ultimately benefits you and your child in the short and long term in your motherhood journey.